The Consequences of Fake Emotions.
There have been times throughout my life that (in a way) I almost wished that I could hide my emotions. Some people don’t handle it well. It makes some people uncomfortable. They just can’t handle it. But that is not your issue. It’s totally their deal. Something I never really understood until these past few years learning and studying about the human condition. It was such a normal thing to discuss how I felt about things with both of my parents. It took me years to realize how very rare this is. They accepted me for who I was, and encouraged me to always be honest. Not just in the general sense…honest about what was troubling me…or the flip side. If I did something that I was really excited about, they encouraged me to celebrate that achievement (big or small) and they celebrated right along with me. I knew that I was lucky, it just wasn’t until I learned some unpleasant realizations about this world that I started to reflect upon just how incredibly lucky I truly was.
So…what are the potential consequences of false or fake emotions?
A false or even nonexistent existence. If you are faking your emotions I would imagine it could get to the point that you are so numb, you are not sure what is real anymore.
Occasional emotional suppression generally won’t cause problems as long as you eventually work through them in healthy, productive and very honest ways. But that doesn’t always happen.
It can become an issue, however, if it becomes a pattern and affects your ability to communicate authentically.
People generally learn to suppress emotions for a few key reasons.
To avoid showing ‘weakness’
Showing emotion can put you in a vulnerable place, and it’s pretty normal to want to avoid exposing vulnerabilities to others.
You might worry expressing certain emotions will lead others to judge you and believe you can’t manage your feelings. As a result, you hide your sadness, fear, disappointment frustration, and other so-called negative emotions.
You could also have some concerns around others using these feelings against you, especially if that’s happened to you before.
To avoid getting hurt.
At times, people will often hide their emotions to protect their relationships.
When someone you care about does something upsetting, you might choose to hide your annoyance.
Yes, their actions bothered you. But if they react negatively when you tell them how you feel, you could end up triggering an even more painful conflict. So, instead, you choose to avoid conflict entirely.
This desire to avoid pain often stems from an underlying lack of trust in yourself and others.
If people have manipulated your emotions in the past, you might fear trusting someone new with your feelings. You might also lack faith in your own ability to handle conflict in a positive and productive way.
Lack of confidence.
If you grow up receiving the message that your opinions and feelings don’t matter, you’ll likely learn to hide your feelings from an early age.
This often happens when parents and caregivers judge or criticize you for expressing your emotions. This judgment isn’t limited to negative emotions, either. That is simply unimaginable to me.
Some parents or caregivers reprimand children for any outburst, negative or positive. Eventually, you may no longer feel safe expressing your opinions and feelings all together, so you hide them to prevent further criticism.
Caregivers who mask their own emotions can also reinforce the idea that you should do the same.
Masking emotions can have some pretty significant effects on physical and emotional health.
Disrupted communication.
By hiding your emotions, you prevent clear communication with the people in your life. This lack of communication makes it extremely difficult to navigate conflict.
When you can’t work through problems, they will more than likely keep happening. And they will escalate. You might eventually become angry and resentful, and these feelings could trigger the conflict you wanted to avoid. You could also start avoiding people who provoke certain emotions, possibly losing relationships you value.
Emotional suppression can become so much of a habit that it begins to happen unconsciously, so you might also notice you begin to lose touch with your own feelings.
You will never learn to be authentic or live an authentic life.
That has to be one of the scariest thoughts I can think of. Yes, you can run the risk of losing someone if you express yourself and they don’t like it, but wouldn’t you start to wonder…’was this person even worth my time?’ The answer is a resounding No!
If you are faking your emotions for self preservation, not wanting to make waves, trying to please everyone, and not wanting to be a burden you need to find yourself some new people who will encourage you to speak your mind and feel safe enough to reveal who you truly are.
However, if you are faking your emotions to ‘get one over on someone’ or pretending to be kind and empathetic when really you couldn’t care less, you will have a very empty, meaningless life. If you are aware enough to know that there are consequences, try as hard as you can to change your behavior and the way you think and look at things. If you do not, you will in not too long a time find yourself very much alone with no real friendships or connections. Who wants to look back on their lives only to reflect upon fake relationships, fake emotions, which essentially is nothing more than a fake existence.
Take a chance. Put yourself out there! You may get hurt, but you might just find some meaning in this world and in your life. I believe it is worth the risk. We have a very limited amount of time here…make it count.
